Flores Para El Hillbilly Muerto

I'm gone to git that sumbitch. I'm gone to git 'im.

I was in the honey hole when I heard her voice screamin', an' started to wonder what could have made my sweet EllaMae holler like that. I stand up and look out the door and I see tears flowin' on EllaMae's face.

"NO! Please don't. Don't! What do you think JimmyBo'd do when he find out?"

"I can take care of JimmyBo just like I gone take care of you."

He done hit her jaw, knocked her out an' dragged her away, an' by the time I was done with my bidness, I couldn't find whedhego. This was the last straw.

I walk home. I walk home an' think about what I'm gone do. This man, this man. I was out by the still one day when I got hit in the back of the head. Next thing I know, my still is gone, without a trace. I had a couple friends who say that they saw the still out by his prope'ty. I went looking for it, but couldn't find it.

One day, all the boys from the holler went out huntin' some coon. There was a shot, an' everyone went over to see who had shot what, on'y to find out it was my coon dog. No one took credit, but he had a look on his face like he was 'bout to bust from tryin not to laugh.

I was sleepin' out in the shed one mornin', when I feel this wetness landin' on my face, all sticky and somethin' like a hot dog slappin me around. I wake up to see him puttin' it back in his pants and headin' out the door. He sees me an' says, "shit, boy, was that you? Huh. I thought you was one of yore pigs, you did that so good."

That was yestuhday, and now tonight he doin this shit. Oh, he wus askin' for it, and now he wus gone get it.

I make it home. "Maw! Maw, where the hell is my coon gun?" "'Cus I need it, that's why? I'm gone to get me a coon."

I found the gun, and head out. That man was gone to get his good an' proper...goooood an' proper.

I make it back to the honey hole, just as I hear some russlin coming from the woods. It's them. EllaMae was cryin' I could tell. In just a couple minutes, they'd be out in the clearing, and then I coud get the sumbitch.

"Stop right there, dickcheese...stop. right. there."

"Now, son, I don--"

"Shut up, paw! I'm done sick and tired o' yore shit. EllaMae, you all right?"

"JimmyBo, what you gone do?"

"I'm gone get rid of some bad blood in the family, s'what I'm gone do."

"JimmyBo, son. You done wanna be doin' this, son, you coud get in trouble, hear?"

"With who? The Sheriff done hate you. Ain't no one in the county gone to be sad to see yore sorry ass go. Now step away from EllaMae."

"She's yore niece, son."

"SHE WUS PROMISED TO ME, YOU CHEATIN' BASTARD! SHE WUS PROMISED TO--"

BLAM!

Somewhere EllaMae screamed. Somewhere, my head split open. Somewhere, my paw wus laughin. I should have knowed he had his own gun.

I open my eyes, an see the sumbitch standin' over me. He spit his chaw in my face, an' start laughing, again. He says, "you wus always slow, JimmyBo. You was always--"

I pull the trigger.